Insatiable (The Curse of Avalon Book 3) Page 4

  “Xan, you just cleaned that yesterday. Now, I know boys are disgusting in the bathroom but unless Trystan was in there after eating Mexican, I’m pretty sure there is no way it needs it again.” I released him, rose a brow expectantly and crossed my arms over my chest waiting for an explanation.

  Xander let out a sigh. He dumped the tote full of supplies on a shelf and peeled his bandanna off, releasing his jet-black strands into his eyes. With a flick of his hand he pushed them aside and glanced down at me. “Okay, you’re right.”

  “So?” I tapped a finger on the opposite arm and waited for him to speak.

  He waved me off. “It’s nothing, really. I’ll be fine.”

  “Fine?” I clicked my tongue. “Come on, Xan. Something is up.” I closed the distance between us with a few steps, slid my hands around his waist and looked up at him.

  I knew a lot of people thought Asian men were short, thin… demure. They were wrong, and Xander certainly wasn’t. I didn’t know if it was because of the curse, or genetics, but Xander hovered around six feet tall, probably six-one, with broad shoulders and lean, sculpted muscle all over his body. He wasn’t as tall or large as Trystan, and nobody was as huge as Mathias, but Xander definitely commanded a presence. A very sultry presence.

  He tensed when I rested my cheek against his chest; even under his gray tee I could still feel the outlines of his defined pecs and I trailed a lone finger around the outline, hoping he’d relax.

  “Ava…” He said slowly, I couldn’t discern his mood by his tone. I wouldn’t say annoyed but… reserved.

  We heard a popping sound behind us and Rhys appeared, waving away an air of mist and smoke.

  “Hey—weren’t you just with the other one?” Rhys asked, shaking a finger at me. “I cannot keep up with you—”

  Xander swiftly pushed me aside and rose his hands, summoning a gust of wind that blew his hair. “Get the fuck—”

  “There he is!” Bash’s door was flung open, and Mathias and Trystan came storming out.

  “Shit!” Rhys cried. Winking at me knowingly, he disappeared again.

  Mathias and Trystan’s expressions were pressed into angry lines of their mouths and narrowed eyes, and with a glance and nod at each other, they went tearing off through the house in search of the infamous wizard.

  “Guys, get down here—we’re going to talk about this!” Mathias commanded.

  Bash stuck his head out of his room, his hands full of pouches, vials, and crystals. He was about to follow the other two, when he noticed Xander and I in the hallway. He offered a curt nod.

  Xander said nothing, but a slight sneer curled up on the corner of his lips. “I think I’ll pass.” Glancing at me briefly, he offered a wry smile and tried to spin away from me and back into the bathroom.

  Bash grumbled. Shaking his head, he said to me, “Ava, will you find out what bug died up his ass, please? I don’t have time to deal with this immaturity. I have to figure out a way to keep Rhys from teleporting in this house. Before he ends up dead.”

  “Yeah…I’ll try,” I said, with a shrug.

  “Good.” He grinned widely, before he spun on his heels after Mathias and Trystan who were busy downstairs yelling loudly.

  I let out a long sigh and turned to follow the storm-wielder. “Xan?” I called, as the door to his bedroom closed behind him.

  Did he just shut the door on me? Oh hell no! I stalked off through his immaculate bathroom and burst through his door just as he was sitting down at the foot of his bed.

  He jumped up quickly, startled again. “Ava, don’t you have a big day tomorrow? Shouldn’t you go to bed?”

  I opened my mouth to speak but stopped; only a squeak of exasperation escaped my mouth. “What now? It’s only like, 8 o’clock!”

  “Oh. Well, still. You should probably get some sleep, it’s going to be a long day,” Xander said blandly.

  “What? Long day? Big day for me? Remember, you assholes are the ones who said, ‘Run a club, Ava!’, ‘It’ll be fun, Ava!’ and ‘We’ll help you, Ava, it’ll be okay!” I clamped my hands on my hips and tapped my foot.

  Xander sighed, turning away. “Yes, you’re right. We’ll still be there for you. I guess I just need…”

  “Need? Need what?” When he didn’t answer; just stared blankly at the wall…that was it. “Goddammit, Jian Xiang, you are not going to play this damn game with me! You want to act like a dickhole to the guys? Fine! But no one let me wallow in my self-pity before, so you aren’t going to either, got it?” I said, eyes narrow as I poked him in the shoulder forcibly with every syllable. I shoved him backwards and onto the bed. When he sat I was nearly eye-level to him, so I could glare at him right in his damn face… his damn handsome face.

  Stop it Ava—get pissed! Stop thinking about getting in his pants!

  A slow smile quirked the corner of his mouth into his trademark, overly-cocky, extremely sexy half smile. He reached and grabbed my finger, pulling it to his lips. “I’m sorry, Avie. You’re absolutely right.”

  “And—” I began yelling again at full volume when his eyes flicked towards me, glittering with emotion as he kissed the top of my finger. “Oh. Sorry. I was liking the yelling. Didn’t realize it was time to stop.”

  Xander chuckled. Wrapping his arms around my middle he leaned into me and rested his cheek against my chest. “I deserved it. I just… I’m sorry. I’m being a jackass, and I’ll get over it. Promise.”

  “But what is wrong?” I pleaded, threading my hands through his hair, stroking gently. He trembled slightly in my arms and glanced up at me.

  “Tell me. Where were you before you came here?” He lifted a brow expectantly and I had the sudden feeling he wasn’t going to like what I was going to tell him.

  “I… um. Mathias’ room?” I replied, fluttering my lashes with feigned innocence.

  He snorted. “Ah. I figured. And, what were you doing there?” Xander looked me up and down. “Your shirt is sorta rumpled, and your pants are twisted sideways.”

  I quickly adjusted the waist of my pants so the seams were aligned with my butt correctly. “So?”

  Xander smiled sadly, turning back to rest his cheek against my boobs again. “I just… never mind.”

  “I don’t understand. But dammit, Jian Alexander Xiang—” I began, and he cut me off as his gaze flashed upwards at me again. Beaming, he said, “You know, I like it when you use my name—my real name,” he said, snaking his hands up my back and under my shirt. Well, it was his official name now according to his “license”. His touch was warm, my nerves were charged, and I shuddered under him, closing my eyes to enjoy the sensation.

  “See? How are you this horny already? You’re a cambion, you’re impervious to my incubus powers. This is what happens if I’m with a normal—” he cut himself off when my eyes flew open and widened.

  I winced, not wanting him to finish his statement. “…when I’m with other women.” That’s what he was going to say, and that’s what I didn’t want to hear. I took a deep breath and slowly pried his hands out of my shirt. “I don’t know what you’re thinking, Xan. Really. Maybe I’m just so into you that just being with you gets me going. But I mean, fine if you want to play this damn game…” I wrenched myself out of his grasp. Glaring at him, I took a step or two backward.

  “Ava,” Xander pleaded, reaching for me but I continued walking away.

  Lifting my hand behind me, I dismissed him. “Nope. I’m done. Bash is right, you’re acting like an immature asshole. Fuck this shit. I wasn’t aware everything was about sex. Maybe I just liked being around you either way, but fuck that. I see that’s only one sided.” When I turned my face away I bit my lip severely, to hide my smirk. He wants to play games? I’m a master at the game.

  Ava. Go easy on him, it’s clear he’s in some kind of pain. The light scent of mist and earth permeated my nose quickly; Igraine was in my head again, and she sometimes was.

  How are you doing that? How do you know when to come into my
head? I demanded in my mind.

  Your feelings are very strong; so are theirs. He’s hurting, Ava. Go easy on him.

  I snorted. “Fuck that.” Thanks, Grandma. I’ll think about it. After I storm out and make him come after me.

  Get him, girl! The voice of my aunt, Morgause, entered the conversation, and I could almost hear Igraine smack her lightly in the shoulder.

  Don’t encourage it!

  “Ava?” Xander questioned, but I was already half way out of his bedroom door.

  “Nope. I’m done.” Grinning to myself, I stormed off down the hall and started up to my room, pausing at the second flight of stairs, listening for the sound of stomping feet as Xander dashed after me.

  “Ava!” He called, footsteps quickening.

  See? Got him right where I want him.

  Be gentle, Ava. Please.

  I chuckled to myself. “Gentle… I don’t think so.” I reached my room and shut the door, flinging myself on my bed, and waited for Xander to come storming in.

  Chapter Four

  “Ava?” The door flung open and Xander stood in the doorframe, looking distraught.

  I glared at him, and flippantly turned away. I sat cross-legged on my bed and moved so my entire back faced him now. I let my hair fall over my face, hiding my shit-ass grin as I pretended to pout.

  The bed on the other side dipped and I knew Xander had sat down. “Ava?” A hand pushed aside my cascade of hair, and Xander peered underneath, grinning widely. “You’re messing with me, aren’t you?” He cocked his sidelong smile, and I stifled a laugh.

  “No, I’m not.”

  “Damn you, you minx!” Xander flung his body over me, pinning himself over me on the bed. My breath hitched feeling his weight over me, his chest rising and falling steadily as he smiled. Slowly, his smile faded away as he leaned over me, tilting his head to the side as he lowered his lips to mine.

  My mouth parted in anticipation, but he merely, barely brushed them over and pulled away, sitting up and climbing off of me.

  My lip puffed out. “Aww.”

  He scooted back on the bed, and pulled his legs up to his chest, wrapping his arms around his knees.

  “Are you going to tell me now?” I sat up and shifted on the bed until I was sitting right in front of him, waiting expectantly for his explanation.

  Xander glanced up at me with an expression of shame on his face. “I’m sorry, Ava. If I’m being honest…” he stopped, biting his lower lip while he thought. “If I’m being honest, Avie… this whole me sharing with everyone else is harder than I thought.”

  I released a breath I didn’t know I was holding. “That’s it? I’m sure it’s weird for everyone. Hell, it’s weird for me.”

  He shook his head quickly. “No, everyone else seems to be generally okay with it. I just… I don’t know…” he stammered.

  My eyes widened, and bile rose up in my throat. I swallowed it back down, nausea taking residence in my stomach as I prepared for the worst. “Oh god. You want to stop seeing me, don’t you?”

  His head snapped up. “No!” I relaxed. “No, I just… need some time to get used to it. I will get used to it. It’s better than being without you,” he said, with a small smile. “I don’t know why I’m having an issue, but…”

  I reached out and clutched his hands in mine. “What can I do to help you feel better, Xan?”

  “I’m not sure there’s anything you can do,” he said, with a sigh. “I’m sorry, I know we all agreed to this, it’s just…”

  “Just what?” I prompted.

  Xander clenched his eyes shut and shook his head lightly. “Mathias thinks there’s a specific reason.”

  “Oh? And what’s that?”

  He looked at me hesitantly, as if deciding to divulge a huge secret. “Okay. But you have to swear not to hold it against me.”

  I chortled. “Hold what against you? Xander, come on just tell me. I’m not going to think any less of you unless you tell me you screwed a sheep or something. Then I’ll just send you to a therapist for a good year and disinfect your junk.”

  Xander laughed. “No, it’s nothing like that! In fact it’s… nothing at all.”

  “I don’t follow,” I said, raising a brow.

  Xander breathed out lengthily. “Ugh. Okay. Before I was cursed with this incubus… shit. I never…” he trailed off, the olive skin on his cheeks turning bright red. I looked at him impatiently and waited for him to finish.

  “The first time I joined with a woman with the curse… was the first time. Ever. I never had a relationship before, never slept with anyone.” He flinched and turned away from me, clearly embarrassed.

  “Wait.” I suddenly realized the levity of what he was saying. “Basically… you were a virgin when you were cursed.”

  “There’s no basically, I was.”

  My mouth fell open. “Oh.” I paused, before I said anything stupid. I didn’t know how to react.

  “I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m not fucking innocent—not at all. Before I learned how to control it, I lost control. A lot. I’m not sure of the outcome of those women, but…” he trailed off. “Ugh, this is embarrassing as shit.”

  “It’s okay, Xan,” I said. Now I was feeling guilty for making him feel guilty.

  “You have to realize…” His gaze flicked upward back to me. “You are my first non-incubus experience.”

  “Really? Well shit, for your first time you sure did a fucking fantastic job!” I said, grinning widely, wiggling my eyebrows suggestively.

  Despite himself, he grinned gently. “Well, that’s good to know. Still…”

  I sighed, realizing what he meant. “Still, you’re having to share your first relationship with someone else. I’m sorry, Xan. I didn’t know—”

  He raised a hand, shaking his head. “No, don’t get me wrong. I love being with you. I don’t really care about sharing—I don’t. Really. Just there’s this little part of me that gets territorial, and…”

  I nodded knowingly. “I think I understand. But, I don’t think any of the guys, besides Trystan, really really had any relationships before they were cursed either.”

  Xander pressed his lips into a thin line. “Oh no? Mathias had been with numerous women before he was cursed. So at least he knows what it felt like without the magic, even if they weren’t actual relationships. Trystan was married, as you know. And Bash…”

  “That’s one reason why he agreed to be cursed, right? The idea that he could finally be noticed with women?”

  “Not quite,” he said. “He had been secretly seeing the mayor’s daughter. They were in love, supposedly,” he added quickly when I began to snarl, “but her father forbade him to see her again, because he had no status. That’s why he began spreading the lie that Bash was poisoning the water as revenge, and that he was a witch.”

  I gasped. “Oh my god. Really? I had no idea.”

  “It’s not something he likes to talk about but… well at least he had that experience. Me?” He laughed derisively. “I was seventeen when we came to California. I was sold into slavery and cursed shortly after.”

  “I can’t believe your dad did that,” I frowned sadly.

  Xander shook his head. “No, I don’t blame him. If he hadn’t ‘sold’ me, I would have gone voluntarily. We were starving. At least doing what I did, my father had money to take home to my family. That’s what happens when you’re a nobody,” he said, his voice low and despondent.

  “Aww…you’re not a nobody to me…qīn'ài de,” I said, with a smirk.

  He flinched. “Did you—what did you say?”

  My cheeks flushed, and I shied away. “Oh sorry, I thought that was Chinese. Or, Mandarin, whatever. I was trying to find—”

  “—No, it is. Pronunciation is a little off, but…where did you learn that?” He asked, surprised.

  I shrugged. “Google is good. I just looked up ‘affectionate Chinese terms’ a while ago and that came up.”

  Xander beamed. “It m
eans, ‘dear’, basically. Well just qīn would work for that. That’s adorable, that you’d look for that.”

  “I hoped it’d cheer you up a little.”

  Still grinning, he dropped his legs, and grasped my hands, urging me closer to him. He leaned forward, and whispered Chinese in honeyed tones into my ear.

  My eyes slowly closed, and I grinned, my toes actually curling at his sexy—if albeit unknown—words. “What does that mean?”

  “Google it.”

  I slapped him playfully in the leg. Xander was still smiling, and it warmed my heart.

  “Seriously though, is there something I can do to help you feel better?” I asked. My hands still clutched in his, I grazed my thumbs in little circles on his knuckles. “Like…what if I set aside a day—a set day—every week. It doesn’t just have to be that day, but it’s always at least that day. I’ll tell the other guys and make sure they back off. Would that work, at least a little?” I asked hopefully.

  Xander’s handsome face softened. “You’d do that for me?”

  I nodded slowly, blushing under the heavy weight of his glittering stare. He reached out and gently stroked a lock of my blonde hair behind my ear. “I’d do just about anything for you. All of you, but we’re talking about you right now. I lo—” I clamped my mouth shut mid-word, my heart leaping in my throat what I realized what I was about to say.

  “You what?” He asked, confused.

  I swallowed thickly, suddenly feeling the air heat up around us. My skin turned fiery, and not just because I was still ready to jump someone.

  Ava…he’s hurting. Just tell him. My grandmother’s voice in my head encouraged. You know you do.

  Yes, Ava…we can feel it. You love him. You love all of them, but right now, he needs to hear it. Morgause echoed my grandmother’s sentiment. Just tell him.

  How do I know, though?

  Did your heart just break at his sadness? Did you just wish you could do anything and everything to make him feel better? Does your breath quicken when he’s near? Do you long to be near him, no matter what?

  “I…” I stammered, forcing myself to look at him. Maybe…